The Micheal Vick Facebook Interview

Recently we sat down with recently indicted NFL star Michael Vick and asked him a couple of questions via the Interview application on Facebook. We thought that the questions being posed to him by the general mass media were all very similar, and he was probably tired of answering those, so we let a Facebook application do the owrk for us. I think our method worked fabulously. The answers were flowing like wine or at least wine coolers and we got some very candid answers from him right off the bat (when I say right off the bat I am still talking about his answers, not puppy heads). Here we go:

Do you own any pets, and if so what do you have?
Although I prefer not to call them pets, I got 19 pitbull terriers. They names Goliath, Bitchbiter, Bonecrusher, Ookie Jr, Stompyou, K-9 Terminata, Slam, Pimpcup, Salivacious, Lucious, Malicious, Dishwax, Bigstaxx, L, Money, O.K.Playa, Deuteronomy, O.J. and FoShoToBeElectrocuted.

what do you think they eat in heaven?
I'm guessing a mix of Purina Puppy Chow and ground beef. That was my previous dog Babykilla's favorite.

What are your "comfy clothes"?
My Roc-a-wear jumpsuit. It da easiest to wash blood stains off of. It be da easiest to fall asleep in.

if you were one of the seven dwarfs, who would you be?
Ookie, bitch.

Rolling Stones or Beatles?
Rolling stones don't work dat good(I prefer throwing them like a football) and VWs don't have dat horsepowa to kill underperforming dogs.

Coke or Pepsi?
I'm gonna go wit da blow.

If you were one word, what word would you be?
God.

What is the name of your truest friend???
Michael Vick a.k.a Ron Mexico a.k.a Ookie, bitch a.k.a. Inmate No.7 son.

Favorite Rapper?
Adam "Pacman" Jones.

Whats your favorite sport?
Dogfighting. No wait, football. Nah, def dogfighting. It jus my thang, you know?

Riding horses or riding dolphins?
I don't fuck wit animals no more.

left handed or right handed?
I usualy be better at hanging underperforming dogs with my left, but I roll wit da right when it come to tazering them.

do you plan in advance?
Always. I never be lettin my dog in the ring without a scouting report on they underperforming dog.

How many hobbies do you have
The fuck is a hobbie? Is dat a breed?

What makes you cry?
Underperforming dogs.

What makes you laugh?
Underperforming dogs. Haha.

If you were an animal in the wild, what would you be?
A badass pitbull, named Reefer. And then I would bet on myslef in fights against da other animals and be da baddest, richest bitch in da woods.

What do you do for fun?
Ride dirtbikes? (over underperforming dogs)

Are you an outdoor or an indoor person?
Well, the outdoors usually provide more room for an arena, but are also a riskier area because of they visibility to dem police helicopters.

What are you most proud of in your life?
My bitch Ookie Jr. She be currently 14-0 and the reigning BNK champion. Ooops! I mean she a great bitch. I mean bitch. I mean dog. /"Where dat blow at?"